Saturday, November 6, 2010

Thoughts on Dating at 40

My initial thought is that, at 40, I’m too old to have crushes and I’m WAY too old to feel like a 12 year old crushing on that cute boy who…

In May of this year, when I started work in the branch, I almost immediately noticed this handsome, gregarious, tall man who is one of our clients. Ok, he’s flirty - what can I say? Anyhow, he’s in about once a week - doing his banking and ALWAYS has a smile on his face and these really mischievous laughing blue eyes that make me want to smile just seeing them.

So maybe 40 isn’t too old to have a crush after all?

Content to crush from afar, I like seeing him when he comes in… I enjoy talking with him if I have him at my wicket and truly, I really like looking at him when he goes back out.

*grin*

Hey - I’m human right?

Anyhow, about 3 weeks ago he was in and being served by the lady at the wicket beside me (damn, not me!) and she called me into the conversation for some assistance. This led to some mild flirting - on HIS part… So maybe I’m not one sided crushing?

Fast forward… (well, ok, not really fast - like anyone else, that last couple of weeks before vacation drags for me too!) to this past Monday - my second client of the day (damn - such a fine way to start my day!) and there his smiling face is! At my wicket! Oh joy! Oh God - I have SUCH a huge crush on him! I thought he was supposed to be having knee surgery last week (turns out they pushed it off to yesterday) and so I was VERY happily surprised to see him.

First words out of his mouth… “So, I’m going to give you my number.“

GAH! REALLY? HONEST? YOU AREN’T JOKING WITH ME? NO FRICKEN WAY!

OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was, of course, able to speak, but THAT is what was running through my brain at the time.

Then reality crashed on me and I remembered that I was heading out on vacation early Saturday morning and would be gone for TWO WHOLE FRICKEN WEEKS!!!

*sigh*

No date this week, but he has said he will take me up for a drive around in the snow when I get back.

All week long, though, I have felt like a 12 year old girl. Alternating between giddy and disbelief. Giddy at the thought of actually, maybe, being liked by this man that I find so attractive, and then utterly disbelieving that I might be liked by this man I find so attractive. I’m certain I have been driving my girlfriends insane with my obsessing over this whole thing…

Who would have thought it? At 40, to actually feel young(ish) and attractive and, well, like a kid!

Maybe I’m not too old after all?

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